Dear World - Insults

Note - There is some swearing in this. I cannot shy away from using such language. To those who are offended, please don't be. I thank ye in advance.

Dear World.

I am all for social networking. I have Twitter, Facebook, MySpace, Foursquare and Formspring. The latter, which is a website that allows people to ask you questions, has sparked the need for me to write this to you. 

A little side note before I continue, I would like to state that I only have MySpace so then I can use it when I think Facebook is too mainstream. I also use Foursquare ironically, as I hardly go out. Forever alone.

Forgive me, I'm babbling on…

Recently, I've began to receive an escalated amount of questions (just under a thousand questions in a matter of days is rather a lot of questions), most of them are from people telling me that they admired me and wanting more information of the workings of Wicid.

Though, in the past few hours, I have had someone ask me a question - Why are you a twat?

It made me think, why am I what that person said I was? Did I do something to this person, behave in a wrong manner to them? Then I thought, why did the person think I am a twat?

I questioned said person in return, inquiring why they believed I am a forest clearing (well, that is what one meaning Wikipedia suggests it is). That person did not budge, only adding that we met once, while, before stating that I write like Shakespeare for some reason, returning two more insults to me - wanker and gay.

Now, it also occurred that this person has only met me once, so I find it rather bizarre that someone could form an opinion of hatred for me through only meeting me the once.

The other thing I rather don't understand is how the word gay is used as an insult.

I will be honest, when I was in secondary school, I was verbally bullied of sorts, with nearly every day at least one person calling me gay, with me defending myself the best I could by just saying "I'm not gay".

It has been over three years now since I've last been called gay… until today. I did not take it as an insult to myself like I did when I was younger. All it really made me do is to wonder why gay is now used as an insult. Well, that and the fact that the youth these days cannot think of interesting and humorous insults that the likes of today's comedians use.

I will be completely honest, I really don't understand why people use gay as an insult. I thought that gay meant happiness, being carefree, only recently (well, in the last few centuries) has the word been linked to homosexuality. So, how exactly is being called gay an insult, exactly?

Thing is, to me, insults have become less intelligent and extremely lazy. Gone are the clever and interesting insults that make the person who was receiving the insult both offended and bamboozled by the content of the insult. No, our ears are surrounded with lazy insults such as "gay", "wanker" and "prick" flying around the airwaves and into out ears.

That said, I do not believe that every one should begin to insult everyone in the world. I think that, if you can, everyone should be nice to one another. Though, I do understand that sometimes some people snap and use language as a weapon. All I ask, Dear World, is that you do not fall to the empire of laziness and end by releasing a "twat" from your mouth. Think of your choice of words, use your linguistical abilities to confuse your target instead of down right being a meanie head. 

I thank ye, world.

Dear World - The Afterlife

Dear World

I find myself revisiting a subject matter that creeps into my mind nearly everyday. Death.

Yes, I've discussed this with you before. Though, that was only about death itself, I believe. Not about what comes after it.

It's rather interesting, I find, what many people think of what comes next. Some say that we will be greeted by a higher power to welcome us into the afterlife, while others say that we will only enter a state of darkness unknown to man, woman and Katie Price.

To be fair, I'm not entirely sure what to think or believe. Saying that, I have thought of what lies in front of us after we close our eyes for the last time. Then again, everyone has an opinion, and this is (one of) mine.

I don't really think that religion is right, neither do I think that we just die when we die. I do think that there is some sort of level system when it comes to life. You know, you start off on a neutral world, then if you were good in that life, then you go up a level, and the reverse would be true if your life was filled with evil.

After you've leveled up enough times, the next life would be the afterlife - Heaven. Meaning, those who have done good in all (or most of) their lives, they will be welcome to a place of eternal loveliness and all that.

If you've been demoted too many times, or have been consistently evil in all your lives, then you will be sent to Hell, a place where you will be tormented for your wrongdoing until the end of time.

I know, this is crazy talk. It's just one idea of mine of what the afterlife holds. Imagine if this is true. If so, then it would be interesting to see what level this life would be - close to Heaven, Hell, or maybe we're at the beginning…

I know, I make no sense. That's just what I hope the afterlife consists of, and not the inevitability of blankness.

I return to the past, world, to a time where I wrote to you about my opinions on God. To be more precise, a comment from a fellow Clic user, Pasternak, where he introduced Pascal's wager. This wager, which he claims is the first thing they teach you in Philosophy of Religion classes, is a summing up of belief in God as if it was a gamble.

If God existed and you believed in him, well done.
If you believed in God and he turns out God's not real, then you've at least done well in this this life.
If God existed and you did not believe in him, then you'll burn for eternity.
If you didn't believe in the almighty and you were right about it, well at least you can be smug those few seconds after you've died.

Now, after reading more about it, I came across something that made more sense to me than Pascal's wager. It's basically the same thing, but about being a good person, and it's called the Atheist's wager.

Simply put…

If you do good in this life, and there is a God, then your gain is infinite (meaning a long stay at the Heaven Inn).
If you lead a good life and there is no God, then your gain is only within this life.
If you do wrong in this life, and there is a God, then your loss is infinite (meaning you'll be in Hell).
If your life is one of evil and there is no God, then your loss is only within this life.

That sounds like a more sane train of thought than Pascal's wager. I don't like the fact that you should be forced to believe in a God just because that has been the believed for generations before my grandparents. And even though God seems to be more likely to allow in his believers than good people, I'd rather known that I've lived my life in a good manner and believed what I believe other than live a life where I feared a being that does not walk among us.

A lovely thought for this week.

I thank ye, world.

Dear World - Education

Dear World

I sometimes think to myself, "did I make the right decision when it comes to my education?"

I have done ever since I had the choice of subjects to study for my GCSE examinations. I ended up studying French, Electronics and Design and Technology. I sometimes wonder would it have been beneficial for me to have studied Music instead of Electronics, but what's done is done.

The second time where I questioned my decision was for my A levels. I began my final hurdle of secondary education studying Art, Chemistry, Physics, Music Technology and Media Studies. A month later, I dropped out of Media since it was heavily essay-based, and I found it awkward to write essays. Nearing the end of the year, I was kicked out of art, but that's nothing to cry about.

One thing that I'm questioning, nearly one year after I made the decision - was university the right decision?

I'll be honest, I thought that heading to university was the next logical step. I thought that's what everybody does. 

I turned into a mindless sheep of UCAS' bidding. Everyone in my year was talking about it. "Where are you heading for university?" a question I heard rather often, with the others being "What courses?" and "Fancy coming down to the Chinese later for dinner?" 

I didn't really mind that nobody from my university applied for the same course as I did. I even though "get in, I'm unique". Well, not really. I thought it will be the best stepping stone for me to get into the world of graphics and design.

Now, nearing the end of the year in my course as I don't have exams this year (get in), I wonder, did I make the right choice?

Look at the facts, the only real things I've learned from this course is to design stuff for web by using code and Flash, while brushing up on my editing skills on Photoshop. Theory wise, I learned about internet safety, the science behind an MP3 file and the difference between high pass filters and low pass filters. And I think to myself, would I have learned all this anyway if I didn't go to university, only it would have taken a longer time for me to learn them?

I can't answer that. I wish I could, but alas I do not possess the ability to turn back time and redo my decision.  Maybe one say some clever Jack will build one, offer it to me because he likes the way I sit on a chair and allow me to see how things wool have turned out.

Come to think of it, is university for me the ultimate form of procrastination?

Confused? Allow me.

Just as I was writing all this down on my merry Mac, I wondered if studying in university was just my way of not getting a full time job. Look at the facts, I'm probably working half as hard as some people are working and earning more than some others. I'm getting a rather decent amount of money just to learn and live, while workers just get small streams of currency flowing to them to feed their needs.

Don't think I'm being rather idiotic here, dear world. I know that I will need to pay back close to twelve thousand pounds for university fees. It was just a thought.

Maybe it's the same reason as to why I have not learned how to drive yet - I don't feel old enough. Maybe university was not the best step to take logically. Maybe I needed to gain experience under my belt via college and the head into adulthood on the ship named university.

I know, I know. I'm going on here. Though, I vow to you now, world. I will not be dropping out of university. University is a big thing. I'm still going through with it. Maybe next year, I'll feel differently.

I thank ye, world.

Dear World - Careers

Dear World,

I'm nineteen, and as such I have thought about the ideal job for me.

When I was young, I thought about becoming an architect. I'll be honest, I was roughly six or so years old and I had no real idea what an architect does, I think it was just the fact that I liked the word architect.

The more I grew, the thoughts of an ideal job for me changed. At one point, I even considered ditching a normal job and head into a cricketing career, though that did not last long, and I blame some of the people in the cricket club that I attended for that fact.

As I entered the GSCE years of my life, I finally discovered the career for me - graphic design. No idea why it occurred, maybe it was the endless image edits that I did during the time.

Now, I'm on the road to have a job in the graphic design industry. I'm studying Creative Technologies inThe ATRiuM (the Cardiff faculty of the University of Glamorgan), which looks at the different aspects of multimedia such as video, radio, the internet and graphics.

I'm also rather involved with Wicid, which is helping me build my confidence up in writing and other stuff in a rather splendid manner. [And a very good job of it you're doing too, Crazy D! - national ed]

I watched a television show on BBC Three the other night. It was called Junior Doctors: Your Life In Their Hands, and it shows a group of student doctors and their journey to becoming a doctor in their chosen subjects, be that surgery or medicine.

It made me think, like many other things in life, what help will my job give the development of the human race?

Look at the different genres of careers that are out there. Doctors help to heal the wounded, while firefighters put their lives on the line to save people and to extinguish fires. The police make sure that everyone's in line with the law. 

Even musicians do good for humanity. Well, sometimes anyways. Some musicians bring peace and joy to the majority of people, while other, less talented musicians inspire other people to join the music career path to show them how it's done.

And there's me, sitting in my room, with Photoshop or Illustrator open on my computer, and I think to myself "what a wonderful world". Well, not really, I think "what am I doing?"

I know, I may be totally wrong with this, but the most I've seen that a web designer or someone has done is to inspire others to design websites or study the joys of typography. And yes, I speak from experience. All I will say on this matter is "Myriad Pro for the win". That and "say no to drugs and Comic Sans."

Though, this is not the only thing that has crossed my mind.

Now, if you have met me in person, it is rather plain to see that I'm not one of these people who takes pride in their appearance. I don't see the point, if I'm completely honest with you. Yes, you have to be presentable, but I wouldn't be far from the truth if I said that some people took it to the extreme.

In one of the ideal jobs of mine, being a graphic or web designer, my job would be making lovely-looking websites or graphics. I might even have jobs that involved airbrushing models. I find it odd that my number one job is a total contradiction to myself. The job is highly driven by the appearance of things, while I am not. Don't you think that this is a match made in Heaven 2.0?

Before I leave you, World, I must admit that graphic design isn't really my number one career of choice. No, it's the music industry, though it's always handy to have a back up plan, eh?

Ever since I learned to play an instrument - which was over three years ago now, seems like only two and a half… - I've wanted to be in a band. I have performed with a band, though playing in the school Eisteddfod isn't really the big time, but it's a start nonetheless.

In recent years, I've been looking for someone to help me with the songs that I've written. Yes, to add more drivel to the million terabytes of pointless content of the interweb, I've created and uploaded a few songs of mine. Though, they lack words.

Ever since the first song that I wrote (which was adequately named "Argh"), I've been looking for a singer/songwriter to help me write lyrics to my songs. Would you care to help me, dear world?

I thank ye, world.

Dear World - Music

Dear World

Do you like music? I do. I think it's a great source of entertainment for the ears. Though, not as much for the eyes though.

No, I'm not trying to be funny here. I thought that was a sensible comment when it arose in my head. Not I'll have to explain myself in more detail.

Sex. Music's full of it. Either in music videos or in the actual songs. And personally, I don't see the point.

Well, obviously, there is a point to it - money.

Sex sells. Just look at R&B, it's filled with a lot of women dancing around rather bland men as they sing about how much money they've earned by disposing all of their enemies from the vicinity and collecting wages from drug deals. Well, that's the "web and Daily Mail friendly" version anyway.

Granted, not all R&B songs are like that. though the majority are. Well, from my point of view, it is. I also find it hard to believe that modern day R&B is derived from the days of proper rhythm and blues, where "urbane, rocking, jazz based basic with a heavy, insistent beat was becoming more popular", according to the website that is well known as being called Wikipedia.

What was I going on about? Oh yes, sex in music videos. This is one reason why I rather despise groups like JLS, where they use their bodies to sell their (let's be honest, for a divine moment here) rather boring music.

Though I know that there is a great amount of sex being used in rock music also, like the song Go That Far by Bret Michaels. There have been two music videos for that song, one with the band performing in front of a white background and one with shots of half naked women dancing around while male "rockers" watch them. Now, as I am a male, you may be likely to assume that I would prefer the video with the lady humans dancing with their lady boobs half out, but that would be sexist of you. As a matter of fact, I don't, I much prefer the band-only video, even if the singer looks like he's been in the odd sun bed.

Allow me to tell you from the outset, I'm not the biggest Justin Bieber or Miley Cyrus fan. Why? Well, to me, they have no groove. Their songs are just typical in the sense that there's nothing new, they use the same formulae to earn money. While others will just say that the songs are the results of an animal's digestive cycle, or the four letter swear word that says it easier, but might have been edited out. Ah well.

That's what gets me, really. I don't understand why people say that they dislike a band or group because they are, to put it lightly, rubbish. Why are they rubbish? Is it because their songs sound too similar to each other? Is it because that the group in question does not match up with your taste? No, it's because they are crap, to put it slightly more bluntly but less obvious than if I said shit.

Like I said, I don't like Justin Bieber's music. He may be a talented person and an all-round nice guy, but I find it rather odd that someone who can play multiple instruments ends up in a music genre that is well known for auto-tuning and electronically-driven music. I also have no liking for his genre, and I doubt that I ever will.

But one thing that rather annoys me is when someone says "I don't like that band, they're too mainstream." This occurred recently when I asked someone if they liked Muse, which they told me that they liked Muse's old work, but their new album's too mainstream.

That is a rather odd comment to state, I thought to myself. You shouldn't dislike a band or group because they are popular, you should dislike them because of something else. Unless they said that Muse was too mainstream for them just too look deep and mysterious - and if so, they need help. Or is that too mainstream for them too?…

I'm not too fussed of the genre of music. As long as it has some sort of groove, then it's my type of music. That's one reason why I like bands such as Skindred (who are in the video above), Muse, Rise Against and Pearl Jam. And another reason why I have no Westlife or Jedward on my iPod. Happy days, eh world?

I thank ye, world. 

Dear World - Welsh Language

Dear World,

I've mentioned a few times in these little snippets of my mind that I am Welsh. Not only that, a Welsh speaker.

Why am I bringing this up again? Well, it's St David's day on the first of March. And as we all know, St David is the patron saint of Wales.

For the past few years, it has hit home that I do not speak my native tongue as often and as confidently as I should. I studied all my compulsory educational life in the Welsh language, using basic words like "helo" and "does dim creision yn y cwpwrdd" at first, then advancing to study poems called Glas and Damwain for GCSE. 

Though, during my time in the educational homes that has a reputation to keep our nation's native tongue alive - or, in short, Welsh schools - I sort of did the opposite, I didn't speak as much Welsh in school as the teachers would have hoped.

And that's the thing, isn't it? If someone keeps telling you to do something over and over again, you're more likely to rebel against it. I think. Well, that's what they tell me anyway.

The more the teachers told me "Siaradwch Gymraeg" (or "speak Welsh" to the non-Welsh speakers), the less likely I was going to after they walked away. I may be alone here, but it's what happened, even if I knew I was doing it or not.

It only hit me as I was gracing the final steps of studying my A Levels that I realised that I lost heap loads of possibilities to speak Welsh. I tried to speak the lingo as often as I could before the final day. But alas, I lost the chances. I am now in university, and the only one in my course that can speak fluent Welsh. It also makes me feel bad that I have not submitted any articles in Welsh to Clic or its sister sites, as I have no confidence whatsoever in writing in Welsh.

Why am I giving you all this information? So what, I speak Welsh, what is it leading too?

Well, I was having a discussion with some fellow humanoids a couple of whiles ago, and one member of this discussion brought up a rather bizarre point. They stated heir belief that the Welsh Assembly Government should end its crusade to bring the Welsh language back to life and concentrate on giving the youth of today some grammar and punctuation lessons via the English language.

They added that everything dies sometime or another, and it would be better for the Welsh language to end sooner rather than later.

And I'm sat there thinking… What?

That makes utterly no sense to me whatsoever.

Yes, just over a fifth of Wales' population can fluently speak Welsh, with the majority of those living in Anglesey and Gwynedd, but it's growing more and more every year. The amount of Welsh speakers in Wales rose from 508,098 in 1991 to 582,368 in 2001. Granted, it does help that a lot of young people aged between five and fifteen can speak the language (40.8%, to be exact). That means more young people are studying in the language. 

Surely that means that the youth of today will carry the flag to make all of Wales fully Welsh? Not if I had the mentality I mentioned before.

If it was a dying language, then I might have agreed with the unnamed acquaintance that I had this discussion with. If all the statistics stated that the amount of Welsh speakers was falling every ten years, then I might be more lenient towards them when they say that the Welsh Assembly Government should concentrate on English grammar. But it's not falling. It's growing. And, hopefully, it will grow even more than the last census in 2001. Though, we'll have to wait to see what the statistics of this years census will tell us about the Welsh language.

I do understand, on the other hand, why they did state what they stated. It is important to give the youth of Wales a good education. It's also important to give them good grammar. But, in all honesty, is it worth sacrificing a language that gives Wales a whole new dimension for the sake of giving the youth a better understanding of the English language?

I do not.

I thank ye, world.

Dear World - Confidence

Dear World

What is the point?

I mean, there's always someone better than you somewhere in the world. Someone who can run faster, play better (be that in sports or instruments) or have a superior linguistical ability than you.

Obviously, this is on about 'Confidence'.

I mean, you can tell that I have no confidence. During the last residential (which is when I'm writing this, surprisingly), I've met people who are opinionated or confident (or both). One of the things we had to do is a thirty second rant about anything. I began mine on alcohol, as I detest it and everything about it.

One person jumped in, and began to state his views. The longer this person did so, the empowerment was clearer to see. This person defeated me in the confidence stakes. I had nothing, not in the argument stakes, I believe that my views are as valid as the next deluded humanoid that believes that somewhere someone is taking not of their musings.

The more I resisted with my views, the harder the person battered me with their confidence. I ended up just walking away and returning to my room, that coincidentally has a bed in it.

As I sat on my bed, drinking from the bottle of a drink, I realised something. The only way that you can get on in this World is to have confidence.

One example, which I believe I discussed with you before, is with compliments. I mean, I think of a hell of a lot of things even before I even consider complimenting someone, such as "How will they take it?", "Will I sound like a stalker?" and "What's the point, they've heard it all before". While a much more confident person will compliment their target with ease.

Referring to the first few sentences that I wrote. I overhear many a people say "Don't listen to them" or "Don't rate yourself against them".

Why not?

I mean, I have a small obsession with statistics, I have a keen interest in how certain stuff is coping and how it's developed. Now, if I did not rate myself against other people, then I wouldn't know where I am in the world in a given profession or ability.

Here's a prime example. During my time studying for my A levels, I hung around with a few blokes. All of them played guitar, with one or two of them playing bass guitar and drums. There were three people in the class who played the drums - me, Bob and Bill.

Bob had played drums for a long time, and that was easy to hear as he played the instrument. Bill, on the other hand, was a learner, like me, yet he was rather good at it.

I'm not sure how Bill looks at things, but I believe that I have the same skill level as him. Yes, we're not a master on the instrument, but if someone told us to break out a beat or jam along to a riff that the guitarists are playing, then Bill and I'll be able to do so with relative ease. Granted, Bill was better than me at some aspects and I was better at others. 

Yet, compared to Bob, it would seem that we're but mere amateurs. If you ranked us on out ability from one to ten, Bob will be an nine-and-a-quarter, while Bill and I will share a rather respectable five-and-a-half. If I didn't know Bob or Bill, I wouldn't have known what I'm heading towards or how my progress was.

And yet, I do that with every aspect in my life - editing images, intelligence, playing instruments, even the way people speak and views (but I do that in a two-poles way, not from one to ten. I hope that makes sense).

I hope, dear world, that I haven't lost a friend in you as you read this mindless drivel. Please forgive my idiocy, I shall look into how I can regain my confidence.

I thank ye, world.

Dear World - Violence

Dear World.

It's safe to say that I am in no way an alfa male. To a greater extent, I'm more of an omega male than a beta one. I haven't got much courage, nor have I confidence.

Neither do I have epic physical prowess, so I've never been in a physical fight. Well, that's not completely true. I did strangle a boy when I was in year nine because he was the opposite to polite to me for the last three years. After I pinned him against the wall, all he had was pleasantries towards me for the rest of the years we knew each other. But yeah, I don't advise anyone to do that mind, I just flipped my anger-flavoured biscuit. Nice.

What I'm heading towards is violence. I am in no way good with violence or fighting. I find it difficult to even watch boxing without worrying about the possible side effects that the participants of the sport will suffer something like a bloody nose, or a loss of an ear. You never know.

So much so, I don't comprehend why people actively search for people fighting on YouTube. I witnessed this first-hand during an Electronics lecture. One student had no idea what to do, neither did he bother to ask. So, he ventured onto the Tube of the You variety, typed in some words, clicked on a link and as soon as the broadband connection of the university's internet allowed it to, a video appeared on the screen.

It's title? Something on the lines of "World's Best Knockouts".

And no, it was not about boxing.

This video was a montage of men knocking out other men for various reasons. Either to stand up for themselves as a group tries to disrupt their evening, to some utter wazzocks beating each other to a pulp because they are filled with alcohol and the disillusion that strength equals everything in the world.

I mean, where's the fascination in that?

It's like in school, where nearly everyone forms a circle around some idiots who are fighting while chanting "fight" in an overly-enthusiastic manner. I'll be honest, I have no idea what's worse - the adolescent round of fisticuffs or the seemingly endless chanting that the circular wall of viewers shout out to entice hatred into the world.

But, what am I getting at here? Well, it was something that I overheard a couple of days ago.

"Is it ever acceptable to smack your children?"

I don't know, but that's a rather odd thing to ask. Obviously, it is acceptable to smack your child. Well, only if they are ruining their lives. I mean, I know I'm no expert, not having any children and all, but it does seem rather extreme to smack a child just because they do something small like not listen to you or something similar.

To me, there's only ever one time that it's acceptable to smack a child, and even then they are well on their way to adulthood. As I said before, I think the only time that it could be acceptable is if that child is ruining their lives. By that, I mean wasting their lives and money on drink and drugs.

By that, I don't mean I'll slap my child at the first chance I get when I realise that they've consumed the poison, but if I see that their present will be the end of their future and they do not listen, then I may resort to a quick smack. And only if I'm extremely angry and frustrated.

Though, as I would consider myself a rather old-fashioned person, I wouldn't do that if my child was female. Or, to put it in different terms, if I had a crack-dependent daughter. 

I've never thought it was acceptable to be violent towards women. Well, there's always an exception that breaks the law. In this case, it is if a female tries to kill me. I mean, if human female named Sunita comes at my manly self with a kitchen knife and a packet of marmite crisps, then I'll obviously fight back. Well, I say fight back, I would just try to defend myself.in the best way that will do the least harm to her. And since I have no experience with self defence, I may accidentally do damage to her. Unintentionally, of course.

But, one thing that strikes me as rather bizarre is something I overheard a while back. One bloke said something on the lines of "if women want the same rights as men, then they should be able to handle a punch or get back into the kitchen", which, to me, seems slightly on the sexist side of the spectrum.

I can't understand that thought process. Equality should be for everyone, not just for those who have a penis. Maybe that's what they meant by that saying - "Everyone is born equal, though some people are born more equal than others". And besides, I know of some women who can take a punch much better than I can, and who can deal more damage back. And no, that isn't scientific research, I did not line people up and began to punch them, allow them to vote who dealt more pain, then do the same as they began to beat us half to death.

Hang on, why does it have to be acceptable to be violent against anyone anyway? Okay, I can marginally understand why in sports, but not in ordinary life.

I thank ye, world.