Dear World - Confidence

Dear World

What is the point?

I mean, there's always someone better than you somewhere in the world. Someone who can run faster, play better (be that in sports or instruments) or have a superior linguistical ability than you.

Obviously, this is on about 'Confidence'.

I mean, you can tell that I have no confidence. During the last residential (which is when I'm writing this, surprisingly), I've met people who are opinionated or confident (or both). One of the things we had to do is a thirty second rant about anything. I began mine on alcohol, as I detest it and everything about it.

One person jumped in, and began to state his views. The longer this person did so, the empowerment was clearer to see. This person defeated me in the confidence stakes. I had nothing, not in the argument stakes, I believe that my views are as valid as the next deluded humanoid that believes that somewhere someone is taking not of their musings.

The more I resisted with my views, the harder the person battered me with their confidence. I ended up just walking away and returning to my room, that coincidentally has a bed in it.

As I sat on my bed, drinking from the bottle of a drink, I realised something. The only way that you can get on in this World is to have confidence.

One example, which I believe I discussed with you before, is with compliments. I mean, I think of a hell of a lot of things even before I even consider complimenting someone, such as "How will they take it?", "Will I sound like a stalker?" and "What's the point, they've heard it all before". While a much more confident person will compliment their target with ease.

Referring to the first few sentences that I wrote. I overhear many a people say "Don't listen to them" or "Don't rate yourself against them".

Why not?

I mean, I have a small obsession with statistics, I have a keen interest in how certain stuff is coping and how it's developed. Now, if I did not rate myself against other people, then I wouldn't know where I am in the world in a given profession or ability.

Here's a prime example. During my time studying for my A levels, I hung around with a few blokes. All of them played guitar, with one or two of them playing bass guitar and drums. There were three people in the class who played the drums - me, Bob and Bill.

Bob had played drums for a long time, and that was easy to hear as he played the instrument. Bill, on the other hand, was a learner, like me, yet he was rather good at it.

I'm not sure how Bill looks at things, but I believe that I have the same skill level as him. Yes, we're not a master on the instrument, but if someone told us to break out a beat or jam along to a riff that the guitarists are playing, then Bill and I'll be able to do so with relative ease. Granted, Bill was better than me at some aspects and I was better at others. 

Yet, compared to Bob, it would seem that we're but mere amateurs. If you ranked us on out ability from one to ten, Bob will be an nine-and-a-quarter, while Bill and I will share a rather respectable five-and-a-half. If I didn't know Bob or Bill, I wouldn't have known what I'm heading towards or how my progress was.

And yet, I do that with every aspect in my life - editing images, intelligence, playing instruments, even the way people speak and views (but I do that in a two-poles way, not from one to ten. I hope that makes sense).

I hope, dear world, that I haven't lost a friend in you as you read this mindless drivel. Please forgive my idiocy, I shall look into how I can regain my confidence.

I thank ye, world.